haha it's been more than a week since i came back to this "hot sunny island of singapore". weather has been mega sian man! keep raining raining raining everyday.. anyway, here's wishing everyone a belated merry christmas! hope everyone had fun during this festive season.

this week since i came back had been, activity-packed i would say (which is good). that also means that it is a very costly week (which is badddddd. like really really baddddd). i'm getting horribly poor, with high expenditure and no income. omg lahhh. furthermore ill have to live with this for another month more before my internship starts. seriously need to watch my spending.

sat met up with ber nicholas justin foo bok jeremy to catch avatar at plaza sing. the graphics are really cool, the scenery is really nice, which more than make up for the storyline which seems slightly plain in comparison. overall i like it. sun, cos promised kevin le, so went to catch bodyguards and assassins with kevin ber grant yongbiao satan. hmm, the meaning behind the story is strong, i feel like i learnt something new abt the rise of democracy in china and stuff. the action also quite good la i should think, one of the better hk action films set in the early 1900s. the behind half did keep my attention centred on the show, so i guess i was captivated by the action once the main part of the story began. overall nt bad too! well i guess it was a gd time to catch up with some platoonmates and specs after ord =)

mon went out with samuel to celebrate my bdae. oh regarding that, would like to thank everyone who wished me happy bdae thru any means, from face-to-face to over-the-phone to sms to msn to facebook wall post. really appreciate it! feel blessed to have friends around haha. anyway, went to try out this place at mandarin gallery, wild honey. nice decor and friendly service, just that food is slightly on the ex side, and no menus are available, have to order at the counter. got this cool itouch which has the photos for u to scroll thru though, which is quite a nice hi-tech touch to the otherwise rather quaint looking cafe/restaurant. btw, it's famous for its tagline: serving breakfasts from all over the world, all-day! which was why samuel chose to bring me there in the first place. sam had scandinavian, which consisted of grilled salmon (nice smokey taste), asparagus (i quite like this veg haha), on a bed of rosti (wad can ever go wrong with pan-fried potato =D). i picked the new york one, with tomatoes, scrambled eggs and sturgeon (yum!), as well as bagel with cream cheese (the bagel is SERIOUSLY fresh and good. i love it haha). oh yea, shared a fruit blend of raspberries, banana and mandarin orange juice with honey. guess i dont need to describe the taste, u prob can imagine how good it is lol.

played bishibashi and photohunt and jubeat and mariokart etcetc at plaza sing before deciding to stop by somewhere to have a chat. went to max brenner's over at esplanade. havent been there for a really long time! i had the whipped granite dark choc, which was wad we ordered b4, while sam took an italian hot choc, which turned out to be surprisingly good! seriously the choc is so rich that u can just finish the drink by dipping ur spoon it, taking it out and then just licking the spoon! lol. ok that sounded a bit gross >.< but basically it's just damn good yeah.

went shopping for some clothes at marina square before i chose timbre for our dinner spot. cos kinda missed the roast duck pizza which i last had at timbre arts house with mortar guys. sam ordered some drink with graprefuit juice and 7-up, while i had something with orange and mint leaves. he didnt really like mint, but for someone who does (like me), i seriously like it! haha. i prob dont need to describe the pizza, tons of ppl have eaten it b4 to know how good it is lol. ok this is seriously turning out to be some food blog post, which i dont intend to make it sound liddat. but basically we just ate and drank the whole day through la (gained dunno how many kg rofl). had a chat on the bus ride back home and cut the cake my mum bought for me haha. yup that concludes my bdae le. by eating and drinking non-stop >.< lol.

tue went top one ktv (2nd time this mth lol) with foo and his 2 friends. omg lahs. foo seriously has some imba friends. i wont say much, but basically it was an EYE-OPENER. kinda makes me think again whether i actually sound decent >.< really cool experience. hoping that foo will invite them again haha. learnt a lot too! so shall try out some changes next few times i go ktv...

xmas eve went justin's house for yet another baking session! haha i always enjoy all the baking sessions, cos i find them really meaningful, u get to spend the day fruitfully, and have end products to bring home! also another great time to catch up with platoon guys =) anyway had justin (duh of cos lol), junhong, samuel, ber, bok, kevin, hanzong around. made pizzas for lunch and baked apple pies and chocolate cookies! had quite a bit of trouble with the seafood pizza, cos we happened to get live prawns, thinking that they'll probably be really fresh, before realising that we gotta be the ones who make them appear beheaded and de-shelled on the pizza dough >.< so it was a tough decision before we went ahead with the deed. urgh, still gimme the shivers thinking abt it. thankfully i was chopping up the capsicums, so i didnt get to handle the prawns. but the comments from ber and justin were bad enough, saying how the body continues to twitch after it has been beheaded and while they were trying to deshell it. euurrghh.

but well, it was a fun day nevertheless! at night went over to qiquan's grandma's house for CO xmas bbq. though the turnout rate wasnt too good, but still got to see quite a no. of hcco peeps! havent seen them for really really long lahhhh. so it was a great time to catch up with them all haha. hoping will see them again next yr if there's any tuan yuan fan bah.. cos missed out on the chance to see a lot others who couldnt make it. had some fun smoking up the whole area with the sparklers hahaha. that seriously had to be the most air polluting box of sparklers i've ever seen lol. it was like PSI 1000 hahaha.

xmas day itself, surprisingly, was quite stay-at-home-y. went out with the morning with kevin and bok to samuel's church over at admiralty to attend xmas service. cos samuel was like asking us when we were at justin's house. i had a horrible experience before, so i was quite apprehensive. but it turned out to be quite alright lah. the play they put up was really pretty good. good cast, decent props, thus there's not much need for a lot of lighting and sound effects, also can put up a really good play. i enjoyed watching it haha. after that went for lunch at northpoint b4 getting ingredients for my first baking experience at home, while they went to catch sherlock holmes.

hmm decided to try out the cookies using the recipe justin followed on xmas eve at his place, cos choco cookies always taste good haha. uh the end results was >.< though. i dunno is cos the cookie too big, or never bake enough, but they turned out quite crumbly... to me they taste ok though, however thats prob just me trying to console myself =.= sadded. but still, shall not give up, im determined to incorporate more of these baking sessions to improve on it and pick it up as a hobby! cos i really enjoy the times i baked at justin's house, but the higher level stuff (like the blackforest cake omg), is really tough sia.. nvm shall aim to improve with prac. my family doesnt really support me though, i got a little pissed off when i was getting ingredients, cos i called home to ask if there's stuff i might not need to get, then they got irritated with me somehow. so in the end i got so pissed i went to buy something which i dont even think is a sift. waste my 9bucks. nvm at least later my dad did help me with the cookie baking, which was good, cos i prob wont know how to start the oven in the first place (yes i'm that noob!). so well, alls well ended well i guess. wait till i decide to bake again to get another earful from my parents ("you think this very fun is it? make a mess of the dining table and the kitchen, then still got so much stuff to clear up? why bother with all the trouble! why want to make ur own! just buy if u really want to give cookies to ur friends lah!"). seems like i dont have the most encouraging parents in the world eh? but nvm, ill persevere! (so pls say my cookies are nice if u all get to eat it! lol. just kidding la, be honest abt it.)

hmm so today overslept for tuition >.< my alarm clock is dying on me la. dunno why never ring de loh zzz. anyway met dj and ruiyuan at somerset for gift shopping. bought some quite nice stuff that im hoping ill get it myself! lol. though the chances are like... low? lol. wah seriously shopped damn long lahhhh. took mrt from 313 somerset to orchard, then went ion to taka to paragon to john little to robinsons to plaza sing g2000. my feet took a serious toll man. lol. was so glad when i finally sat down for dinner la! anyway had my first meal at xing wang after becoming a member lolol. hmm the baked rice nt bad, wont mind ordering again lol. so in the end, on top of my gift, got another business shirt to add to my collection for next yr's use. sian lah, now need to like free up this space for all these kinda formal stuff liao, unless i wanna repeat the same few shirts and pants for the next 7 weeks.. urgh sian. that means more money flying awayyyyyyy.

i think i dont really have to explain why im broke now yeah? seriously need to watch my expenditure liao. as in SERIOUSLYYYYYYYY. oh did i mention im going to spend a bomb on the new non-army phone im getting? so much for watching my expenditure >.<

argh lemme strike a windfall or something. $$ ka-ching issues suck.

heyo back again from sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam. omg im like so busy now on the computer, trying to constantly chat with 4 ppl on msn, while helping my sis out with some booking of her flight ticket due to some problems. omg im on a typing frenzy! there better not be any blackouts tonight!!

anyway gonna be a short post la, considering nth much happened today lol. a really perfect day to nuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. since the weather's so horrible >.< keep so cloudy and gloomy, then rainy. zzz. well anyway did absolutely NOTHING productive in the morning, went back to bungalow after breakfast and just slack in there, reading my book. finished 5 ppl u meet in heaven. it's a really really awsome read. made me think abt quite a few things... now i know why yongbiao say he read it like 5 times haha. seriously it's something u can't get tired of, and the lessons u learn in it is invaluable, in any part of ur life. somehow i just felt like i should treasure everything and everyone around me more, and this is probably one of the most important messages the book is trying to convey bah. on to for one more day now, another amazing read... shall comment more after i'm done with it haha (which most probably will be on the plane back to sg tml...)

hmm went to the beach with dad and mum for a bit around noon, was just there to enjoy the waves lapping at ur feet, and sand under it. mom made some words from the seashells lying around, then i dunno why i suddenly had the urge to run all the way back to our bungalow and get my bro's camera, then run all the way back to take it haha. just a spur of the moment kinda urge. now i also don't really know why... i guess it's partially the magical effect the book had on me bah >.< anyway had quite a good time, though we didnt do much haha, mum picking seashells, dad walking around, me just staying near the seaside and enjoying the cool water hitting my feet. it's probably one of the few times i didnt mind the gloomy weather that much, as it was rather cooling and i didnt have to shun from the sun or smth.

afternoon went back to hoi an to collect our tailormade clothes. whee have new formal pants for internship next yr lo! not half bad either, nice designs picked, good tailor quality = gd comfortable pants! lol. ok im so advertising for them. but sis had some problems though, cos she ordered a vietnamese traditional costume and there were some problems with the sleeves, then the collar. we had to keep the whole busload of ppl going back to sandy beach resort waiting! >.< haha hope they weren't too pissed off with us lol. then again, we were only 5 min late. but, alls well ended well. the tailor ppl sent over the final altered set, and my sis was satisfied with it, so yep, we got all our goods with a smiley *cue for loads of smiley faces*

ok clothes aside, went to have lunch/dinner at hoi an again, at a different restaurant this time. bro tried the cao lau i had the other time, as it was a hoi an specialty. hmm differently done, but still as good. mum had chicken pho (lol we are all becoming pho- addicts i think, cos it's rather healthy and tasty too). dad had fried rice, while sis and i had fried rice + sweet and sour chicken. thankfully the sweet and sour chicken this time wasnt like ytd's fish, though done in a more tom yum manner, with pineapples and tomatoes and chillis. again, not exactly what we were thinking, but still better than ytd's fish lol. and YESSSS, i ordered vietnamese coffee!! whee, finally go to drink it haha. really not bad sia, esp with the fresh milk. very, freshly brewed kinda taste lol. but too bad didnt get to brew it myself, it already came in the brewed coffee form with a small plate of sugar and a small pitcher of milk. still, yumyum.

and another huge YESSSS to finally getting to eat banh mi! as in the real proper roadside one, with the subway style veggies/meats/sauces combo. and true to its word, it was really nice too! though quite spicy lol, i had to drink plenty of water after that lol. but i did feel quite happy after eating it, cos was really looking forward to it. cos saw quite a no. of stalls u know, but didnt get the chance to really go buy it due to circumstances. so now, even if im going to get a tummyache or wad after that, i dont care liao lol. im in bliss~~ (omg look at what food can turn me into. gg this is a bad bad sign.)

so yup, pretty happy i got my vietnamese sub + vietnamese coffee wishes granted (seriously i can get so contented over just food >.<). now i can rest in peace. ok lol im kidding, that sounded so inauspicious. but, on a more serious note, the trip is coming to an end liao, it's my last night over here. flying back to sg tml morning... sigh, end of a fairytale dream. but ok la, did feel the closer family bonds that i used to constantly complain i didnt have, so for that i'm very very satisfied =) and did feel a lot more refreshed and ready to take on new challenges that await me after my return! all recharged and energisedd! shall spend some more quiet time tonight, and tml on the plane to think over some stuff, then i'll really be ready for the rest of the month, and a long year ahead of me in 2010. well, so i would say this trip ended on a pretty good note, with no regrets!

guess i do have my fairytale ending :D

well then, for the very last time, saying ciaoz from second-left most computer (i didnt get my favourite left most comp again >.<), lobby of sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam! cya peeps back in the hot sunny island of singapore! (though im pretty sure it's not exactly the case over there now =.=)

back live from sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam! lol, weather here's pretty bad today. raining whole day sia. if not of my undying determination to blog a post, i prob will be snuggling in the bungalow under my blanket, reading yongbiao's 5 people you meet in heaven. up till now, all i can say, it's a greaaaaaaaaaaaat read. shall rush back to finish it up after blogging, if my siblings haven't all go zzz yet lol.

wah i damn hip sia, now typing this in the resort lobby while listening to my mp3 lol. hope later i dont accidentally sing out some lyrics or start shaking my head to the music. lol im kidding im kidding. anyway as i'm typing this, i'm filled with dread, cos like abt less than 15 min ago, there was a massive blackout siaaa. in the main building at least, i dunno abt the bungalow area where my family is haha. scarrrrry. later everything i typed gone or the draft not saved i can go jump building liao lol. actually im not exactly really surprised at the blackout lol, considering how much stuff they leave on 24hr! these computers for instance. i mean ya la, it's ok to leave the comp overnight, i do that real often. but imagine leaving it on say, for 1 mth? omg la. haha. dont forget tons of other lights in the lobby, as well as the bling bling decoration lights they have outside the resort on all the trees. i dunno is for xmas and new year, or whole yr round one lol.

ok enough abt the lights lol. on to today's itinery. well today was quite ok la, but the rain was quite a spoiler. left the resort with quite a lot of anticipation, cos we had this car all to ourselves, with a driver who can speak minimal english. so it's like a mini one-day roadtrip kinda thing. quite cool. then the tour was expected to last abt 11 hrs, so i was like, "wow, must be a lot of things to see!" only to find out the reason behind the tour taking 11hrs is cos the first destination is a 2.5 hrs drive away. omg. >.< but ok la, along the way, just zzz loh, since had to wake up early for this trip anyway. the driver not bad haha, actually stopped by some mountainside road for us to take rather nice pictures of the mountains and the seashores. quite a magnificent sight, albeit quite cloudy, thus blocking quite a bit of everything =(. then continued the loooooooooooong trip to this pagoda.

ok sorry abt not being able to name anything haha, cos vietnamese is sooooo hard to remember how to pronounce. but in any case, today's trip is more of sightseeing and taking random pictures with nice ancient ruins and scenery, while totally not knowing anything abt it lol. cos my bro, when ordering for the tour, forgot abt the tour guide! haha. might as well la, considering we'll probably not understand half of what the tour guide will be saying anyway, and we're not exactly that keen on finding out everything behind those places we went. it's just, a little weird la, going for a whole day to these 3 different places, but ending up not knowing anything abt them haha. the only things we can remember from them are probably where are the nice places to take photos rofl. ok that sounded slightly bimbotic.

after the pagoda, with this giant bell (nice photo spot), and this giant tortoise carrying some tablet (also not bad photo spot), i roughly gathered it's some spot for praying to deities one la, since got quite a few sculptures and stuff. anyway, went to the citadel of hue after that (ah i know the name for this, cos it's like the highlight of the trip. it looked quite magnificent from outside too, with a loooooooooooooooooooooooooong talllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll wall, and a big vietnamese flag high up waving in the wind. it's really quite impressive. from the outside that is. after going in, hmm, kinda disappointing loh. ok la, partly also cos we were kinda lazy to walk everything (it was so frigging big), we only went abt 40% of it before we got bored of it. well mainly, it's the ruins of some ancient castle, so got like all the imperial style architecture and artifacts. prob is, most of them are so destroyed there's only stone ruins with overgrowing weeds (which isnt too bad for photos, but totally has no link to the main aim which is to understand the history of the civillisation loh), or they are under massive reconstruction (like repainting, even probably rebuilding the walls and furniture) so much so that they now look so fake. then wad's the point loh, if they are oh-so-nice-and-pristine, but totally cannot exemplify the actual history of the citidel. ok la, overall got the effect of its majestic feel, from its sheer size (it's really damn biggggg), the moat that surrounded the WHOLE castle wall (that's seriously damn long i can tell u), all the castle doors (there's this wu3 men2, which supposedly is the place being portrayed in all those ancient chinese drama serials the place where people get executed - wu3 men2 zhan3 shou3), and all the backyard gardens (lol i'm so directly translating - hou4 hua1 yuan2), which are probably the only places worth taking, cos the plants still look rather overgrown, and not so bad that the photo will turn out bad. so u get ur photogenic yet authentic moments with them lol. but if u're going for the details, then really nth much loh. cos either authentic ruins that have eroded and corroded until nth left, or super nice and pristine artifacts and palace rooms that have obviously been tampered with to get, which then totally loses its purpose. as what my bro said, liddat might as well go take photos in the chinese garden, why bother going all the way there to take photos like those.

omg it just blackouted again. thank god for draft saving functions. if not i really need to go jump building liao >.< whewwww. ok i better type faster being it happens again =.= ok moving on, went for lunch at some restaurant which didnt really suit my appetite, mebbe i'm not that used to vietnamese dishes with rice. those noodle dishes and fried rice and appetitisers taste good, but their dishes with rice, like sweet and sour fish, is totally nth like what we were expecting lol. so was the salty braised pork and chicken with mushroom (in fact i hardly saw any chicken in it. nor mushrooms for that matter lol.) anyway after lunch it began to pour again (wad a suay suay day zzz).

stopped at the last stop, some tomb of some vietnamese king or prince or smth (sorry la, no tour guide is liddat one, totally dunno what's going on haha). all i know is the crypt/tomb part was super nice la, first time i see not all golden and shiny, but in actual fact made from ceramic shards, which gives it an actually really good jewel feel, from the colourful and shiny reflections from the ceramic shards. the artist/sculptor was really zai too, knowing how to combine the different coloured ceramic shards to form different shapes, like bonsais, animals, and chinese characters. OMG it blackouted AGAIN. this is proving to be one of the hardest blog posts i ever typed. i better hurry hurry. yup too bad photos not out yet, if not i'm really quite impressed, cos from far it looks really really good, the up close u notice actually there are like pieces from those broken plates and bowls u have at home. ceramic and porcelain-y.

oh yeah, had a taste of french bread here finally. but mebbe cos of the vague meaning of the vietnamese word for the subway sub-like thing i was looking for (banh mi), the driver brought us to some bakery to get french pastries. hmm they weren't too bad la, and cheap somemore. just that i was more looking forward to what i was looking for >.< hope i get to eat it tml! as for vietnamese coffee... hmm, i probably wont get the chance to taste in here in danang le i think. probably more common in hanoi or ho chi minh. still, i'm hoping! haha.

tml's gonna be a quite relaxed day i think. still dunno what to do in the morning yet, but afternoon definitely heading over to hoi an to collect our new tailor made clothes (pants for me), and im waiting for my banh mi! lol omg i just realised that the only vietnamese words i know are all food, like pho, com, com ga, com chien, and banh mi lol. that's not a good sign lol. but i can't avoid it anyway, i know it liao. i'm so getting fatterrrrrrr on this trip. ggfied man lol. keep eating non-stop sia.

whew finally come to the end of today. better send this before it blackout again lol. signing off from the 2nd computer from the left, lobby of sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam (didnt get my leftmost one cos some guy was using, but he left after the first blackout. hah, looks like i got the most determination here man! lol)!

lol random post from sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam! ok la, im just randomly having the urge to blog cos of my forced-cut-short post before i left sg on mon due to oversleeping >.< hope that i wont get too fed up trying to type on this keyboard which i'm not exactly very familiar with..

now that i'm more free, i think it should be good that i do more updating of my blog. it seriously needs a new face le, just that i'm ultra lazy to go find a new blogskin lol. anyway, the first 2 days here at danang have been not too bad. the resort's pretty cosy, we got upgraded to adjoining bungalows close to the sea, so have nice cooling sea breezes, food's quite alright, and having a 11hr long full day tour awaiting tml haha. went to danang city han market today, quite typical of any market, with first floor fresh and dried produce, and the second floor with shoes bags clothes and all the whatnot. interesting slice of life in vietnam la, i would say. too bad i didnt bring my camera, but hope my siblings and my dad did capture some images of the place though. seldom get to see the rows and rows of flower and fruit stalls. bought some jambu and dragonfruits. big and really sweet! haha. apart from the freakout incident when the first jambu my bro bit into, he inspected a worm slowly climbing out of the fruit. what's worse, he showed it to me, which caused me a phobia of every bite of jambu i ate after that >.<

afternoon went to hoi an ancient town, didnt really get to see much la haha, went to tailor make formal pants to prep for work next year though. not cheap leh here, but probably because we went to a rather renowned shop. it had like 2 storeys and loads of sales assistants and stuff. the variety of cloth just for men (which are all in shades of black, navy, grey, brown) is astounding enough le, wait till u head over to the women's side where they offer cloth to make vietnamese traditional dresses. it's o-m-g. lol.

after that took SUPER long before we found some decent restaurant to have our late lunch cum early dinner. mum, bro and sis had pho (not too bad haha), i had cao lau (some dried noodle thingy), dad had some chinese rice. shared vietnamese fried spring rolls (those transparent rice paper wrapping kind) and shrimp on sugarcane. quite an interesting variety of rather authentic vietnamese food la haha, i would say. now im just waiting to try the vietnamese style sub! saw a couple of stalls, but when i really wanted to go buy and try out after the meal, all just suddenly vanish into thin air >.< what a disappointment. i hope i get to try it before we leave loh! and vietnamese coffee, loads of ppl telling me it's gd. well, see fate lol, see if i get to try these 2 things out over here..

looking forward to tml's day tour. though i think it'll be rather tiring loh, leaving here at 8am and coming back abt 11 hrs later. omigosh. prob need to turn in early tonight lol.

hmm that's all i have for today i think, shall go fb a bit then better get off liao. im advised to use the comp for a max of 30min but im prob going to hog it like for 2 hrs lol. but aiya, no one using anyway, all making use of the free wi-fi here, which i'm like soooooo envious of ppl with laptops or PHONES THAT CAN ACCESS INTERNET right now. this is so motivating me to get my 7-11 bought 98 buck non-camera ns army phone out of the way and introduce something iphoney or blackberry-y. but sigh, the fact is i dont have it, so i'll have to make do with hogging the lobby computers for 2 hrs at one go lol. no privacy lehhhh. while my bro and sis can so totally lie on their beds in the aircon bungalow >.< enjoying eh. okok no use getting envious. my time will come =D

k la, signing off now, back again on leftmost computer (closest to alamanda restaurant), lobby of sandy beach resort, danang, vietnam tml!

hmm, haven't blogged for a while. a month flew by, dec 12 flew by, and yes, i'm now a civillian once more. missed my pink ic sia. looks in such pristine condition compared to my 11b lol. to think that 2 sundays ago, i was still standing at the sentry box, doing guard duty >.< ahh, let's not go into that.

well actually thanks to all the offs i've chalked up, i've been leading a rather civillian-y life, so to be truthful, i don't really find ord such a big deal. ok ppl who haven't ord are probably going to kill me for this, but ppl who have already ord-ed will probably agree with me. it's just moving on into the next phase of life, civillian-wise into the workforce and facing all the stress and workloads, or into uni life with lots of academic stuff to catch up and stress from exams and projects. oh let's try to put it in the military sense, i've finally finished with my two years, only to await 10 more years of reservist, ippts and RTs (omigosh), mobs etcetc. and the obligation to inform someone whenever i go overseas isn't exactly something that exudes freedom and release from ns right?

okok i shan't go into that lol. still a fact is a fact, i'll prob never, or not going to step into keat hong camp for a long long time.. KUDOS to all mortar plt buddies who have gone thru the 1 yr 8-9mths with me. i had a great time having u all around =) thanks a lot for everything, that made my ns life less miserable. thinking abt this, i feel better already lol. though it's probably momentary bliss.

life after ns is rather mapped out now, though with loads of uncertainties along the way. uh i'll probably stay in sg for uni le, considering that no scholarship providers want to offer me anything (so sad), so overseas is out of the question. going ahead with a ddp, hoping the workload wont kill me or something. will strive to work hard la i guess, but i really dont wish to have a no-life kind of uni life. that'll be damn sad, considering this is probably the last time i'm studying full-time before stepping into the workforce and leading an ultra mundane life from then onwards. at least lemme enjoy my last 4-5 years having some sort of fun and enjoyment before all the seriousness and maturity steps in yeah?

work-wise, managed to get an internship with moe, and better still, going back to hwachong to intern haha. i think it's really nice of them to accept me as an intern, and back to my alma mater, so for that i'm really glad. although it's not exactly well-paying, considering i'll only get 7 wks worth of pay, subject to cpf contributions, and me being assigned to teach j1 chem (they are going to be like 3 yrs younger only >.<), i'm thinking it'll be a gd experience la, and i'll probably learn quite a lot from it, so i don't mind the little amt of pay that much. as long as there's a stable income, and my bank acc doesn't start decreasing at an alarming rate, or i end up seeing a big fat 0.00, i should be fine. =)

going to be quite free till end jan, thinking of any last min or mega short term jobs to do in the 1+ mth i have. hopefully everything works out! if not, i'll just nuaaaaaa and do stuff which i've always wanted to ba, before the busy jc school term engulfs me lol. shall hope for more cookouts/baking sessions with justin, or basic piano lessons from dunjie (i wanna learn dango dango dango!) =) not forgetting the poor jap book that i've neglected for probably a month or so >.< (guilty guilty).

ok la, i have to cut this short cos i meant to wake up early to blog but i overslept >.< in a while's time, heading to the airport liao. flying to vietnam! the land of pho (lol i feel so noob cos i dunno anything significant abt vietnam) back on fri, shall blog again and update abt it! =) my first holiday with ALL my family members since i dunno when liao. so quite looking forward to it. it's been a long time since it's all 5 of us haha. shall ask my bro and sis to take loads of photos to upload when i come back! lol.

hmm im such a weird person, wonder if i'm optimistic or pessimistic. sometimes i confuse myself. seriously.

ok till then!

hmm haven't blogged in a while. well i've been meaning to, seeing at i'm at home for the past few days cos i'm on att c due to my swollen-ankle-worsened-to-foot-to-almost-leg-then-recovered-back-to-ankle-and-not-seeming-to-improve condition. ok i practically just summarised my condition in one line.

sigh just when i was starting to feel a bit happier at the fact that life seems getting a bit better. then have to be struck by this problem. docs also cant really determine the cause, just dismissing it as a skin infection. so stayed in alexandra hospital for 3 days under drip+antibiotics before being able to go home, on att c.

yeah yeah, i know i should be happy that i'm on att c, can no need go back camp and siam stuff etc, like guard duties. well, though in one way that is true, but i feel quite bad for activating the reserves and stuff. and who knows how many duties i'll have to make up after i come back? and i dont get to bid farewell to those ppl nov ord, and for some, what if we hardly meet again. it's kinda sad u know. i already feel it when ppl like foo tell me how he and the rest felt when the leopard ppl orded last fri. well though i wasn't there, but i can feel something still loh.

and i hate this condition now. ok la, im DEFINITELY not some health freak or what, as anyone can tell from my diet and my size, but i experienced the long period of building back up my fitness after my major illness with my blood platelets back in feb 08, so i understand how tough it is to catch up. plus my fitness isn't good at all to start with, and i absolutely detest exercises that strain my arms (mainly sparking from the fact i'm not a strong guy to start with, and my size la). knowing of future ippts coming up though my chances of passing them are slim and close to none, as well as wanting to tire myself out once in a while, i actually do like light jogging and swimming. i feel it gives me time to think abt stuff and listen to music and even relax in that sense (although the irony is there whereby i'm panting and sweating like crap).

but when u are down with a condition like this, there's nth of this sort u can do. just when i was beginning to gear up for some running around my house area on days off now that im taking more days off away from camp. so i'm like stuck with a swollen ankle and having difficulties walking, not to even mention jogging or running or doing anything strenuous, and seriously that sucks. feeling discomfort and even pain when just standing in front of the sink brushing ur teeth and washing ur face, sometimes i even resort to standing on my good foot.

so i'm desperately praying for it to go away soon. im not someone who wants to try every opportunity to chao keng, so though it seems good for me to take a break from camp and all the shit i gotta do in there, in some sense i wished i never had this, so i dont have to feel the guilt for other ppl doing my guard duty (like larence who had to do my wkend one, and hz who now needs to do the day before his ord),

the frustration that i cannot walk properly and having my fitness deteriorating by the day, just getting fat and useless,

the regret that i cannot see fellow platoonmates ord and say some last encouraging words to those who i might just not see again for a long long time, it's like i never got the chance to say goodbye properly,

the anxiety in what's lying in store for me after i go back, whether i can cope with the pt and if ill have to make up guard duties like siao, or will i not have a smoothsailing ord cos of various reasons,

the sense of dread that i havent got the chance to go for my driving lessons for like close to 3 wks, and how on earth am i going to get all my practising and confidence in time for my TP. and how badly i'm going to fare when i go back for my first lesson after such a loooong hiatus. it's seriously very worrisome now, and i'm oh so prepared to fail liao. it's probably a miracle if i pass now,

and the emo feeling that i always get when things like this happen. i don't like it when all ur plans just shatter like this. i seriously seriously hate it. now everything has to be replanned, and there are just some things that are different once changes are made. a broken vase can be mended again using superglue, but the cracks will forever be there. it is just like that. i dont like feeling useless. i want to do the things i want to do again, not be restricted by this stupid swollen ankle which just refuses to subside and hinder even my basic movement. that sucks totally you know.

argh, i guess i'm just feeling angsty. i dunno what i'm ranting anymore. life just likes to play tricks on you. i dunno how to get around it anymore.

as i'm typing, the heavy downpour outside my window is slowly subsiding into a drizzle. when will my ankle do the same? and will i ever get to see the clear sky again. even if i do, how soon?

wow how time flies. i didn't even expect my blog to be kept in cold storage for close to a month. but though it may seem fast to me this way, the month itself didn't exactly pass by THAT slowly. nevertheless, i'm one month closer to end of the year, and that of cos means... o. r. d. lol.

the ord package has been quite depressing lol. totally took the ord mood out of me. having to hear abt the tons of things u need to do after u ord, makes ord seem so small in ur ns life after all. i still rmb those days in bmt, when all i did was to look forward to pop, and when the day finally arrived, u realised that 3 months has passed and there are 21 more to go. now is really similar, probably just worse. 2 years are going to pass, and there are 10 more to go. TEN CYCLES. ahhh sinking into depression liao.

life's getting a bit more low-key now during weekdays, albeit daily pt, vehicle maintainence, and ippt (urgh another one coming up this week). that's good, so i can spend more time on things that are important to me, and i've interest in, like learning jap and reading, even catching up with the rest of the platoon before the nov ppl all ord.

during weekends, other than the usual routine of driving lessons, it's quite a lot of going out, and spending hordes of money in the process. ok i may be exaggarating when i say i'm broke, until like penniless. but really, spending too much money, especially on food, which like goes into ur tummy then serve no other purpose liao. but even those stuff i buy like new berms, belt, bag, possibly shoes someday, also cost quite a bit. so all i need to do is probably to cut down on other expenses and try to console myself that this is all for a fresh start after ord. lol. even wensi agrees that it's a good excuse haha.

so being the spendthrift me, managed to get a weekend available at home, though quite boring, but at least i wasn't spending much. managed to get some stuff done, so thats good. but lots of stuff on-going, and some i haven't got to doing yet, so that'll prob take place next weekend ba. all these includes signing up for tutor-student matching sites, as well as sending emails back to hwachong and asking if they require relief teachers. dunno where else to approach le... seeing how hc is doing well in his job, and how hz has been going to scheduled interviews one after another from thu to sat, it really serves as a good source of motivation. i feel quite determined not to just rot at home after being inspired by them haha.

dunno what came over me, mebbe it's the fear from the prospect of RT if i don't pass ippt after i ord. suddenly went to dig out my old running gear. ok it sounds like pro or wad, but it's just old school t-shirts and bball shorts (uh nope i dont play, it's just for sports usage), as well as running socks and my mega old sports shoes which i prob last wore back in j2. went to workout a bit this weekend, seeing that i haven't many appointments and was rotting at home anyways. hopefully this short-term burst of motivation will last and i can keep it sustained so i wont balloon back to some obese guy after i ord. if not 6 mths after i ord i'll prob fail 2.4km running lol.

next month's going to be a sad month, with all the nov guys ord-ing and the platoon will literally be halved. also, that means a crazy load of guard duty befalling upon the ptp and bp guys. and i seriously mean crazy. got 4 duties coming up waiting for me, 2 of which wkends, and 3 of them are consecutive, simply just alternating every other day. i dunno how big an impact that's going to weigh on me loh. confirm damn shagged for the whole 2 weeks de loh. hopefully can get to apply some off so that at least i can relax a bit after that crazy period. hmm, really hope that the platoon can still stay in touch after all the nov ppl ord, and i can still see them often enough. quite glad to meet up with hongchuan rather frequently, though i know that it's mostly due to hz's credit. with hz gone too by mid nov, i wonder if i'll still get to see them much... but then again, people always say army buddies you make during ns time will remain as ur buddies even after ord. i hope that'll come true =)

with hopefully more tuition assignments coming up, trying to keep up with my slight pt routine, maintaining communication with my school regarding the relief teaching, having to look for jobs in case my relief teaching hopes fall through, and perhaps, if i regain my confidence after this year's utter failure, to reapply for overseas unis and scholarships, on top of catching up with friends and getting new stuff (while deluding myself that this is all for a fresh start after ord lol), and more driving (oh how can i ever forget that >.<), i am going to have quite a fulfilling 2 months prior to my ord. which is a promising start to my civilian life i hope. i'm all ready for it! so please let me ord soon lol. *prays fervently for that day to arrive*

was quite glad to see sam and ryan last sun. went to have hi-tea buffet at thomson plaza, courtesy of remi to celebrate auntie ivy's bdae. haha quite happy to meet up with all his family members again, though uncle stanley wasn't around as he was sick. though we didn't meet for that long, going to play arcade and watch a movie after that (hurt locker), which wasn't much conversation and communication, still i could feel how comfortable we were with each other, and that assured me that our friendship was still strong after all, just overly long hiatus in between meetups. the last time we met, i still remember, was in aug on the day of ahm! that's like 2 months ago liao. well anyway, we were talking abt going for a trip sometime soon, and i sincerely hope it will realise.

talking abt trips, my family trip has shrunk to a 4 day trip instead of the originally planned 7-8 days since dad had insufficient leave left. initially felt a little disappointed, but then got over it le. so what if we are not going to travel very far or very long, as long as the whole family goes together, i'm sure it'll be fun. and yeah, got over the fact that i can't go for the 6d trip. ok it's not REALLY 100% confirmed yet, since the trip now is only 4 days and if the timings are just, i may just be able to make it for both! lol that will be the best case scenario la, though i won't dare to think so optimistically. now all i can do is to wait for my bro, who is helping to decide and book the family trip, to finalise all the details so i know if it clashes still with the 6d trip. and of cos i have to factor in if i do want to go for a trip so soon after coming back from one la. well all these hopefully gets decided by this wkend or something, or my chances of going to the 6d thailand trip will just diminish by the day, considering that there's so limited time left and i can't even decide to book air tickets.

i just hope everything will work out!! ord smoothly with minimal ippts and guard duties, find relief teaching job smoothly, if not some other stable desk job, get tuition assignments smoothly, having driving lessons and pass tp smoothly, get to go for both trips smoothly, and get to go on holiday with ryan and sam smoothly. so many things to handle, so little time. and incredible amounts of luck and opportunities and cooperation before everything can go on nicely. life's not all smooth-sailing i know, and i'm of cos just idealising when i wish for everything to go on perfectly.

but one can dream, can't he? =)

strangely feeling this ray of hope. i seldom get so optimistic lol.

must be finally having the ord-mood.